Everyone makes mistakes, and if you plan to live with someone your entire life, disagreements are going to be unavoidable. Because of this, it’s especially important to understand how to handle those situations in the heat of the moment. Why? Because the chances are, it might not seem like anything once both of you calm down.
The bottom line is that destroying or harming an otherwise good and healthy relationship because of small conflicts is never worth it. In fact, conflicts can boost relationships if handled properly – and we’re here to help you learn how to do just that.
The bottom line is that destroying or harming an otherwise good and healthy relationship because of small conflicts is never worth it. In fact, conflicts can boost relationships if handled properly – and we’re here to help you learn how to do just that.
Take a Deep Breath
If someone verbally attacks you, being angry and defending yourself may seem like the only solution at the moment. But if someone shouts angry words at you, being angry in return does absolutely nothing. There’s always a way to resolve a conflict, but the first step is to stay calm on both sides. This allows clear thinking and logic, as well as effective communication.
Sometimes, taking a breath means going outside for a walk, as nature can help cure sadness. Find something that you enjoy doing – whether it’s cooking, drawing, gaming, or listening to music – and keep your mind away from the problem for a second. Even if the conflict seems impossible to resolve at the moment, it might turn into an easy talk after a few days.
Sometimes, taking a breath means going outside for a walk, as nature can help cure sadness. Find something that you enjoy doing – whether it’s cooking, drawing, gaming, or listening to music – and keep your mind away from the problem for a second. Even if the conflict seems impossible to resolve at the moment, it might turn into an easy talk after a few days.
Check your attitude
Are you always going to be right in your relationship? The true answer is no, whether you like it or not. Never blame it all on your partner. Instead, put yourself in their shoes and try to imagine the difficulties they are dealing with. Identify your negative emotions and don’t let them interfere with your decisions.
You may also find that the true reason behind your discomfort is not your partner, but some external problem. To resolve a conflict, the forgiveness of your partner and acceptance of your mistakes is key. A broken trust can be difficult to heal, but it is possible, just as long as enough time and effort are put in.
Admitting mistakes, being honest, and putting your partner first will eventually add up to forgiveness. Take responsibility when you need to, and remember to give your partner time and space to heal, as well.
Are you always going to be right in your relationship? The true answer is no, whether you like it or not. Never blame it all on your partner. Instead, put yourself in their shoes and try to imagine the difficulties they are dealing with. Identify your negative emotions and don’t let them interfere with your decisions.
You may also find that the true reason behind your discomfort is not your partner, but some external problem. To resolve a conflict, the forgiveness of your partner and acceptance of your mistakes is key. A broken trust can be difficult to heal, but it is possible, just as long as enough time and effort are put in.
Admitting mistakes, being honest, and putting your partner first will eventually add up to forgiveness. Take responsibility when you need to, and remember to give your partner time and space to heal, as well.
Focus on Communication
Talk things out and be direct. Never give them the silent treatment, as that only adds to the frustration and confusion. Organize your thoughts, then calmly state them to your partner in simple and direct ways.
Be careful about how much emotion you include in your speech. Instead of saying “You always annoy me,” state when and why that’s the case. On the other hand, carefully listen to your partner’s argument, too. Think of this as a debate rather than a conflict.
Show that you’re listening by asking questions and confirming thoughts. If you disagree, don’t just stop listening. It can be easy to automatically reject your partner’s opinion, but wait for your partner to express their full argument before you say why you agree or not.
Be careful about how much emotion you include in your speech. Instead of saying “You always annoy me,” state when and why that’s the case. On the other hand, carefully listen to your partner’s argument, too. Think of this as a debate rather than a conflict.
Show that you’re listening by asking questions and confirming thoughts. If you disagree, don’t just stop listening. It can be easy to automatically reject your partner’s opinion, but wait for your partner to express their full argument before you say why you agree or not.
Know what the problem is
The goal of a discussion is to identify and solve the root of a problem. It’s not to argue back and forth and launch into other problems, leaving you in a mess at the end. Compromises and taking a step back for the both of you are usually how a problem gets resolved.
However, know your boundaries. If the issue is something very big and impactful – such as whether to have kids or not – think twice about your decision to step back or not. A successful relationship doesn’t necessarily mean that both of you should share the same goals, dreams, and values.
Instead, it means that however different they are, both sides feel understood and respected. Not every day with your partner can be a honeymoon, but doing your best to overcome these difficulties and talk things through will help make your relationship last an eternity.
The goal of a discussion is to identify and solve the root of a problem. It’s not to argue back and forth and launch into other problems, leaving you in a mess at the end. Compromises and taking a step back for the both of you are usually how a problem gets resolved.
However, know your boundaries. If the issue is something very big and impactful – such as whether to have kids or not – think twice about your decision to step back or not. A successful relationship doesn’t necessarily mean that both of you should share the same goals, dreams, and values.
Instead, it means that however different they are, both sides feel understood and respected. Not every day with your partner can be a honeymoon, but doing your best to overcome these difficulties and talk things through will help make your relationship last an eternity.